Are you waiting to be happy?
Attaining happiness is a choice that requires effort, just like developing any other state of mind.
Rabbi Noach Weinberg zt"l wrote in his book "48 Ways to Wisdom," that a lack of appreciation is the core reason why one might find it difficult to be happy. Trying to connect happiness to a state or object puts you on an emotional roller-coaster, leaving you disappointed once the initial excitement fades.
Albert Einstein is quoted as saying: "If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things."
We can see this clearly in "spoiled" children, even when raised with good intentions. Their ability to appreciate and be happy is hindered by constant stimulation and expectations for more.
The antidote is gratitude - fully appreciating every small blessing in your life.
Rabbi Weinberg suggests spending one full hour listing everything you're grateful for to test your level of appreciation:
The first 15 minutes will be easy, becoming increasingly difficult as you progress.
While doing this exercise, consider if you value your ability to see or hear more than the use of your arms and legs.
Continually reminding yourself of what you have will help you recognize when you're being ungrateful.
If your natural disposition is to be critical, disappointed, unhappy, or cynical, know that you may have missed opportunities in life due to your negative attitude. Only you have the power to change and improve.
Committing to being more positive and appreciative is hard work, but the payoff is well worth the effort.
Communication
Picture someone you know who constantly complains and is negative. How enjoyable is their company?
Ask yourself how pleasant it is to be around you when you're irritated, annoyed, and unhappy.
People who are genuinely happy and at peace naturally attract goodness and are enjoyable to be around.
If you have communication issues, ask yourself, "Am I someone others want to listen to?"
Self-Improvement The Torah teaches us that those who don't serve H'shem with a happy heart may lose divine guidance and bring curses upon themselves. Why?
Being dissatisfied and unhappy essentially rejects the life H'shem has chosen for you.
When in a bad mood, you focus on the negative, missing potential and positive aspects.
A happy disposition is essential for any growth process.
Emuna, Bitachon, and Tefilah:
Someone who can't see H’shem’s blessings will find it impossible to trust in Him.
The more you recognize the endless gifts you receive, the more you'll feel H’shem in your life.
Morning prayers are about counting our daily blessings from the Creator.
To cultivate gratitude, start by learning the meaning of each blessing and saying it with intent and happiness.
Conclusion: Happiness isn't something that happens to you—it's something you create through gratitude and appreciation. By consciously choosing to focus on your blessings rather than what you lack, you open yourself to greater joy, better relationships, and a deeper spiritual connection. Start today by listing what you're grateful for, and watch as your perspective shifts toward happiness. Photo by Devin Avery on Unsplash
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